John Michael's Betrothed

My Internet friend, Sheila, and I were pregnant together twice - the first time I with John Michael and she with Grace, the second time I with David and she with Olivia. When JM and Grace were born we jokingly decided to bind them in betrothal. Our families have lots in common - they are a strong Catholic family with 7 children and on the Feingold diet. I couldn't do any better than that for JM! And, while Sheila and I have never met IRL, I know she'd make a great mother-in-law for him.

Well this year Sheila and I decided to exchange Christmas cards. Her picture arrived in the mail a few days ago and I handed it to JM yesterday and explained to him that he is "betrothed" to Grace. Once he understood what that meant, he grabbed that picture from me and carried it around for about the next 5 hours. Finally he came to me with consternation written all over his face and wailed, "I don't want to be married to Grace!" Then he tried to rip the picture. I stopped him by assuring him that it is just a funny thing and this really isn't set in stone. He tried to spit on the picture and we got him to stop worrying about it by suggesting that he think of something else bright in his future - like opening his own Food Store. Of course, mention of a Food Store put stars in his eyes and he immediately forgot all about Grace and started asking questions like "Would all the food be mine?" "Could I pick the food for the store?" "Will I make lots of money?"

This afternoon we were in the car together traveling to the Food Store when I brought up this whole issue of marriage again. "Why are you so upset about marrying Grace, John?" He looked at me with that My Poor Stupid Mother Doesn't Know Anything Look and said, "Mom, I don't have any money. I can't get married until I make some money." "So once you open your food store and make some money, then you can marry Grace?" He rolled his eyes at me, sighed heavily and said, "Yes." Apparently, I just don't know much about the responsibilities of caring for a future spouse.